I love October!
The colours , the changing of the seasons. Coal & Logs bundled in shed. Candles flickering , a good series on the television or an enticing book to disappear inside!
I’ve always seen October as the Celtic new Year! Halloween has always felt like New Year’s Eve for me. I reflect on the year that was and make plans for what lies ahead.
I was in New Jersey for my aunts 60th in September and I met the youngest edition to the family. Baby Brynn has my Nannie’s eyes and a sense of knowing passed between us. She recognised me and I recognised her.
It’s like a part of my nanny is alive in the world again. I’m absolutely in love with her.
I also had a teddy bear made from one of my Nannies tops.
I can’t really explain it.
The irish phrase I would use is that ‘I made strange with it’. I have a friend whose family members bought her a teddy in memory of a loved one in spirit and she has not been able to remove it from the box it came in!
Isn’t grief funny?
For one person it could be such a beautiful gift and another very triggering.
When I got my rose tattooed on our birthdays it really helped me cope.
I carry her with me spiritually & physically every day.
However what is a remedy for one person can be poison to another.
It’s why I always caution against buying a reading for a loved one.
It’s such a deeply personal connection. What may resonate with your energy may conflict with another’s.
It can be a personality clash (there is no such thing as a one size fits all medium), both the medium and the sitter are responsible for the energy they bring to a sitting.
Unfortunately Anger is a part of grief and I’ve had to end one or two sittings in my career , owing to the fact that the sitter came to the reading furiously wanting me to be wrong. Looking for conflict where there was none. Almost spitting the words that her family member had found comfort from me.
At first , and to be honest I felt so sorry for her as I could sense the pain she was in..I started connecting but she immediately started interrupting me it’s was Tommy not Tom , Johnny not John etc.
I tried to patiently explain it’s not a telephone line and she went off!
I ended her session (refunding her instantly!) as she was not in the right mindset for a sitting and her grief had made her adversarial and bitter. That’s also a very natural part of grief. You are looking at the most awful cretinous individuals walking around hearty & healthy. There is the one person who lit up your day wiped off the face of the earth. It’s enough to turn the strongest stomach.
I did not take offence.
Now she tried to offend me before I ended the call, but this person knew nothing of my heart and I could clearly see the pain in hers. I will always be an advocate for therapy and counselling. I understand it’s not for everyone but in certain cases it can really help.
I digress! Back to October being the Celtic new year. The veil draws thin and Grief can trickle out!
Our loved ones are at peace and are always sending us signs. We have to be able to be receptive enough to spot them. Anger & resentment can block these signs making their way to us, as we are still struggling to accept their passing. In truth, it is not until we accept our loved one has passed can we begin to feel their presence in spirit. Lighting a simple candle in their memory, saying hello to that cheeky robin can open a window to your heart and lying within is your eternal bond with them.
October brings with it a shedding of the old. Leaves decay and die.
Any unfinished plans or old beliefs you no longer hold can be thrown upon the bonfire to be cleansed & renewed. Mistakes were made. Losses were felt & held. There was also joy in the messiness of life. Glimmers sparking through.
A oasis of stars on the deck of stormy boat crossing. The light around the moon.
Keep space in your heart for the glimmers, create them if you have to but they will carry you across the darkest night.
Have a good month!
Lots of love
Fiona
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(C) Fiona Faery
